Weight...WAIT!

I haven't worked out in two weeks--

TWO WEEKS!!!!

I feel so guilty...but at the same time, not enough to get me to go. Looks like I'm in a rut. OH CRAP! I don't want to be in a rut, but I can't make myself go!

What happened to that motivation I had goin for me??

My mom said I've hit a plateau. I've lost 5 lbs. since I started my workout/healthy eating thing and I haven't been able to kick more lbs. off yet! I need/want to lose another 8-10 but keep sitting on the same weight no matter how little and healthy I eat and how much I work out. She assures me that I need to stick to it because I WILL eventually keep losing weight, I just have to get by this plateau stage.

So how do I get myself back to the gym?? How do I put myself back on the healthy eating obsession I had going for a bit?

Is this about being healthy or am I trying to just be skinny??

Ever since I can remember, I've had an obsession with my weight. You can ask pretty much any roommate I've ever had...any coworker I've complained to...I'm NEVER happy with my weight and it always becomes a topic that I talk people's ears off about.

I'm not even fat. I know I'm not. I may not be happy with the way I look sometimes but I do know that I'm not fat. It's taken me a very long time to be able to realize that. I've had this obsession with my weight since I was in high school because I truly believed that I was fat. HA! Sure wish I could go back to that body I had then!

No I'm not fat, but in my family... I'm the biggest one. Especially after my mom discovered this quick weight loss diet that has worked wonders for her. She looks awesome!

After dabbling a little with very unhealthy weight-loss techniques... :\
I finally landed on adderall-that's healthy right?? (I hope you know I'm kidding)

I took adderall for years. Technically I do have ADHD (ha, I'm sure any of my former teachers would attest to that). I was diagnosed at a young age (one of the perks of having psychologist parents!) and have taken some sort of ADD/ADHD medicine since the age of 9. But I was never consistent with it.

Once I realized that it worked as an appetizer suppressant, I became very consistent with it. For years my weight management was solely managed my adderall.--and then I met Joseph.

Not only did he make me feel comfortable with my body. He realized what I relied on to stay thin and did not like it at all. He finally sat me down and explained to me why it was not good to be taking that and that he didn't even like the person I was when on it.

Normal= very bubbly, giggly, outgoing person
On Adderall= quiet, anti-social, serious, sad

"Either you stop taking that drug or I walk out of that door, you choose."

EASY ANSWER. There was no way I was going to let such a great guy walk out of my life all because I can't stand to be heavier than 107 lbs.

I started gaining weight....

kept gaining weight...

can't just eat whatever I want??

gained more weight...

Waking up almost 3 years after I "quit" adderall and after eating plenty of whataburger and fried foods...I weighed myself. I saw a number that shocked me...seeing 125 large, bold and staring at me with a grin from the scale... S*** hit the fan!!
(just to explain, I know that 125 isn't a lot but I am 5'1"--My average weight for my height is 105-115)

Can't fit into those size 2 jeans I was wearing while taking adderall. Can't fit into those "fat" size 4 jeans I was wearing on bloated days.

After I started working out and eating healthy in January, like I said, I've dropped 5 lbs. I don't expect to ever get back down to 107, but I would like to get to at least 112 again--soo 8 more lbs! Only 8 more!!!!!

Adderall is still something that is floating around in the back of my head. But that would be the easy way out. I need to be healthy, toned, and happy!

That's it! I've reached my motivation point again!! Away I go to the gym! Lets be healthy and feel good about ourselves!! WITHOUT UNHEALTHY "HELP"!

P.S.-those 5 lbs have allowed me to squeeze back into those size 4's...but still wearing bigger sizes for different pants.