I'm feeling...stuck
I feel like my life isn't going anywhere. I know that sounds silly considering I'm only 23...but I'M 23! And I feel that I have nothing to show for it!
People my age have good jobs...are engaged or married...buying houses...expecting a child...
I'm not even sure if I want any of that right now..maybe I do or maybe I'm just thinking that I want it because people around me have it..
I just don't feel like my life is improving or moving forward.
Saturday I met up with my old roommate whom I haven't seen in nearly 2 years...yes we've chatted on the phone a few times but I was so excited to see her and really catch up!...except I had nothing to tell her...nothing! I literally said the words..."umm hmm nothings really new with me!"
Because nothing is. I graduated school A YEAR AND A HALF AGO (eek) and got an ok job-not the job I really want still but I do love it- and I've just been living day to day with no improvements, no changes, no new life explorations. Just living.
I'm stuck.
I don't even know what I'm waiting for. I don't know what I want.
Practically every time I get on facebook I see another couple engaged or pregnant. I don't feel like I'm fulfilling my life the way I should be.
I don't know why I'm so upset about this. I'm happy...I really am! Though my job isn't EXACTLY what I want, I love my it...I love my man...I love my house, my dog, my family, my friends!
And I'm not sure I'm ready to get married and I'm definitely not ready to have a baby! I need/want to find that job that I get to go home and say "yes! I'm a teacher and I absolutely LOVE my job!" I want to be able to update people with some actual info...some actual events and happenings. But I got nothin'! YET!
I just want to feel like I'm living..and right now all I feel is stuck.
Tess-All I gotta stay is SLOW DOWN! You're ONLY 23--23 years of age! Repeat that! You've only been able to drink legally for TWO years! :) Trust me when I say-life happens so fast and don't for one second get down on yourself for thinking you aren't where you should be or think you might want to be...enjoy life as it is, right now in this moment because once you get married-you are married and don't get to be single again. Once you become pregnant-you will always be a mommy.
ReplyDeleteI love you sooooo much--hang in there but please, please remember that you're not stuck-your in a GREAT place and life doesnt have to move so fast all the time! I love you to pieces chicka!
Thanks marsais!! That really lifted my spirits! and you're right!!!!
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